Perfectly Imperfect: Resilience Coaching For Parents & The Kids They Love
You love your kids so much and it is your job to make sure they will be okay.
It is the hardest job in the world with 24/7 pressure and responsibility, little recognition and zero pay. It will drain your bank account, stretch you past your limit, and enroll you in the life-time worry club. There’s no training, constructive feedback or opportunities for promotion.
You’re literally flying by the seat of your pants.
And everyone else in this job seems to be doing it better than you.
Who, in their right mind, would ever choose this?
You did.
You’re a parent.
You chose it, and continue to show up every day, bringing them to 5 a.m. practice, and helping them with their homework after your own incredibly exhausting day, because of the bone-deep love you have for your child. That love makes it all worthwhile. You have made it your job to make sure they are not only ok, but also happy.
And it's also that same intense love that tells you, you have to get it “right.” And it tells you, you have to be perfect and now so do they.
Perfect is success. And success is achieving.
Good grades. Making the team. Building the college resume.
Somewhere along the way achievement became more important than love.
Now you are locked in because this is what you have to do.
So, you put the not-so-great moments in the rear view to speed toward the next superficial milestone. The focus isn’t on you both as connected, growing, loving human beings. It’s on what has to happen when, in the right way, at the right time. All those “have-to’s” come at a cost to your relationship making the hardest job in the world even harder and far less fulfilling.
Do you even know what price you are paying (for everything to look good)?
What does that mean for your child over the course of their life?
What other choices do you have?
Let’s be real.
Children know what pretend is and easily sense the difference between what’s fake and what’s real. If you aren’t authentic, you’re not giving them permission to be. If you are pretending to be perfect, they will have to too.
Pursuing perfection will get you hollow compliance or outright refusal undercutting your effectiveness as a parent and splintering your relationship.
Let’s be clear.
There is no such thing as “right.” There is only what’s right for you and what’s right for your child – which are not necessarily the same things. So, how do you find out what that is? How do you model that for your child, so they can know too?
Let’s be resilient
Being a parent doesn’t mean you have to know all the answers and fix all the problems.
If you did and do, how will they learn?
Confidence is earned by trying and failing, trying again, failing again, and figuring it out. Failure IS learning. Bumps in the road are a part of life. Your child needs to know how to bounce back from a setback, how to learn from it, and how to make better decisions. That’s resilience.
Being a good parent means you love and support them through their failure/learning, so they build the confidence to try. It means doing it for yourself, too.
And now, THAT is the hardest part of the hardest job in the world.
You don’t have to do it alone. You don’t have to start from scratch.
You don’t have to recreate the wheel when you work with me.
Let’s Start Yesterday
Hi, I'm Louise. I’m a parent coach and mom of three kids. I know from both personal and professional experience how hard this job is and what little support you get given all the pressure to be a "good parent”.
Before I became a coach, being a good mom meant that my kids had to be successful and, as a result, happy. All. The. Time.
I believed achievement was happiness and it was my job to make that happen.
If they were successful, it meant I was doing a good job. I was a good mother.
If they didn’t and it wasn’t all PERFECT, it was my fault. I was a failure.
The parenting boomerang effect was in full force.
Looking back on those moments, I realize I made it all about me. I let that all-important “us” get lost somewhere along the way. And the worst part is that in doing all the “things,” I created the opposite of what I wanted. Shaking off failure and shame, especially when it’s so tangled up with love, isn’t easy. I learned that perfection is exhausting and imperfection is authenticity.
It starts with you.
Identifying and letting go of your perfection patterns is the real work here. As a professional parent coach, I have the tools and frameworks to support you in doing exactly that.
So, let’s write your new job description together. You’ll know it’s “right” when it puts the focus back on bone-deep love with endless possibilities for deeper, authentic connection for both of you.
Let’s Get To Work
Schedule a confidential consultation with me.